I have no idea where the days go. I spend 10 hours at work, 8 hours asleep, maybe 2 travelling and reading, and the rest, probably daydreaming. I feel like I've withdrawn even further into myself than normal. I've been avoiding messages and people I actually know and like, and I have no idea why. Sometimes I feel like I'm becoming ill again but I don't want to dwell on that, especially now when I'm learning to actually do the things I think about.
Speaking of, Chaos Theory, the Jeff Goldblum Zine is finished! Finally!
I actually can't believe I managed to finish something with a group of people. But yes, it's finally done. It cost me an arm and a leg to print but I think it's worth it. Hopefully other people do too. It's for sale here.
Apart from that, I've learned some things and have some things to say but feel like I'm waiting for a break, or for time, some stars to align, or for a clear head. That has to stop because my head is never clear. So I'll put it all here in a rush because that's what it's been like for the past couple of weeks.
(Marilyn Monroe, David Bowie, Michael Jackson, John Lennon)
I'm not worrying about the fact that I haven't written an essay in a long time, and am just playing with my current obsessions: blissymbolics, celebrity deaths and myths. Maybe it will translate back into a written piece. It's so weird, I find it easier (at the moment) to say what I mean with fewer words, and in some cases no words at all.
I've been reading a lot of Rolling Stone obituaries and trying to see how we write about dead celebrities, and after watching Series 2 of Work of Art (oh my days I never knew this existed for the longest time! It's like project runway for artists!) I found out about Adam McEwen, this artist that used to write obituaries for the Daily Telegraph, and then turned obituaries into art by writing his own for celebrities who are still alive, like MacCauley Culkin and Jeff Koons. And while I was ecstatic, I was also like "NOOOOOO! Fuck you, bitch! Ugh! I'm so jealous I didn't think of that!"
But it's cool. Got a new artist/writer to look into now, and see where all this morbid fascination in the deaths and legacies of pop cultural icons goes.